Heres some interesting info from
professionals in the mental health field...
Myths & Facts About
CrossDressing...
1) Crossdressers Are Gay
More than likely not. As Dr. William Stayton, Head of the
University of Pennsylvania's Department of Human Sexuality and himself a therapist for
crossdressers, reported "People associate crossdressing with effeminacy and being gay
and the fact is most of them are not gay. They are very definitely heterosexual. "In
fact one of the most difficult areas for crossdressers was how to deal with the women with
whom they wanted to be involved.
2) Crossdressers Don't Like Women
The truth is that rather than shying away from women,
most crossdressers are as married or looking for a relationship as any cross section of
men in America. "There is even some advantage to being a heterosexual
crossdresser," says Dr. Stayton. "When dressed they often become more sensitive
and understanding to the women in their lives. Their wives tend to find them delightful
and often it can become a real enhancement to marital relations." However that
"enhancement" can only come if the woman feels comfortable with her husband's
occasional dressing. Many don't. As Florida lawyer Jeff/Jean reports, "What would
happen was that as soon as women found out about "Jean" the relationship would
end, so why did I have to keep banging myself in the head. I was married to a woman that
didn't approve and it was painful. Now I tell the women and let them even see
"Jean." If we're going to be involved then they'll have to accept all of me just
like I have to accept all of them."
3) Women Who Love Crossdressers Must Be Lesbians
What's it like to love a man who's wearing a dress? Pam, the
wife of a Bank V.P crossdresser recounts "I did feel funny at first. I love my
husband as a man but when I saw him in a dress as "Barbara," I thought how can I
love him? The answer was I didn't have to love him the same way. With "Barbara,"
we're friends like I would be with any girlfriend. When he's dressed as a man, I feel free
to love him as a man."
4) Crossdressers Dress For Sexual Gratification
Most crossdressers reveal that relieving stress and
relaxation were the feelings they most associated with their crossdressing. However many
revealed that while teenagers there was a high degree of sexual excitement related to
crossdressing mostly relieved through masturbation. As hormones calmed down and they
reached adulthood the sexual element declined and the feelings the crossdressing elicited
were very different." What you'll find," Dr. Stayton reported, "is that
very early on they associate these clothes with relaxation and stress relieval. They often
use it to feel calmer. There is an erotic element to the crossdressing. Many will
crossdress or fantasize about being CD to enhance sexual enjoyment, but its not
necessary."
5) Crossdressers Always Wear Women's Clothes
In fact, most may only dress once a month or once every six
months. Many men don't ever even reach the point of fully dressing but feel the same
relaxed feeling by just wearing women's undies under their suits. "You can't imagine
how many politicians can't give a speech in Congress without wearing women's
panties," Dr. Stayton commented, adding he has first hand knowledge since many are
his patients.
6) Crossdressers Have Weird Sexual Habits
No more than most. However crossdressers did report their
sex lives were enhanced by crossdressing to some degree. "Dale" recounted that
"Although many CDs will deny it, there is a degree of extra arousal that comes with
being crossdressed when
making love but many women are not comfortable with that and we men have to be sensitive
to that and accept it."
7) Crossdressers Look Like RuPaul
In fact many crossdressers are most comfortable dressing
their " femme " selves as they would dress their male selves. Therefore most
conventions of crossdressers find a roomful of men in dressed for success women's suits,
low heels, tasteful makeup and coifed hair...much more Margaret Thatcher than RuPaul.
8) Crossdressing Develops in Adulthood
"We really find that crossdressing starts very
young," reports Dr. Stayton. "Many remember that as preschoolers they got a
certain feeling with Mom's clothing. It's very rarely something that develops in
adulthood.
9) Crossdressers Are Made, Not Born
The current conventional wisdom seems to be that
crossdressing is a result of both Nature and Nurture. "I certainly think there's a
genetic influence just as for all of us there are things that happen that program us as to
how we'll be sexual, whether we'll like redheads or thin women. We all have preferences,
but the truth is there's no common thread and we really don't know why it happens,"
reports Dr.Stayton.
10) Crossdressers Are Schizophrenic
In reality crossdressers exhibit slight personality
alterations in their "femme" role, but in general, their personalities only
change to the extent that many people's do when assuming different roles in life, i.e.
CEO, husband, father. One wife reports her husband likes to dance as his "femme"
self where he wouldn't feel that free as a man. Other wives recount how their husbands
will shop with them when otherwise they'd never have the patience.
11) Crossdressing Can Be Cured
"Truth is you can't change it," Dr. Stayton
concludes. Most professionals now try to counsel the crossdresser to deal with his
crossdressing rather than eradicate it. "When someone comes to me and feels it's sick
behavior, then to me helping them to be healthy is to help them accept it and to be able
to appropriately accept their own crossdressing feelings."
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